NaNo is officially over. I had an amazing month this time around. I wrote 86,594 before the clock rolled over to 12:01 and, get this, the story isn't over yet. Previous years where I hit 50,000, I could get there just under the wire and with a great deal of padding, but this year? Very, very little padding. I'm kind of amazed. Make no mistake, there's still plenty to fix (for one, my steampunk subplot got one chapter and two mentions and then nothing), but what I've got is a strong first draft.

Well, when I get it finished it'll be a strong first draft. I've got to finish the chapter I'm on (which may become two), and then write at least one chapter after that. It's so weird to be at this point and not be willing to wave the whole thing off for awhile.

Also, my comic book industry allegory became a tragic, epic love story with lesbians. The comic books are still there, certainly, but they are not front and center as I expected.

And now, back to the regular world and homework.

I came across an article that set my blood boiling and then followed that link to another article that set my blood boiling higher. The content of the articles is completely unimportant; it's the fact that I saw red and got pissed and started complaining about the stupidity of people. When it used to happen, I'd swim in it; dive down deep, let myself soak it up. But now, quite honestly, I can't hardly be bothered. I let this one get me mad enough to write a couple of things, but even those got nearly deleted. I can pretty much guarantee that I'd have made a seriously epic, lengthy post about it a few years ago.

It is quite nice to no longer care at the level I used to. It's a relief to know that I can let my blood boil, take a deep breath, and let it go. I wasn't like that a few years ago, not by a long shot, and it still surprises me that I've learned to get up and walk away, or stop a conversation or refuse to start one.

I've still got the occasional flare-up; I can still throw myself into a spectacular rant or get caught in a conversation that will send me into seeing red, but there are so few examples of that now, so little that turns my switch, and that's really nice.

And, hell, I'm pretty sure if I hadn't read those articles while trying not to puke from period cramps, I'd have rolled my eyes and clicked away. Or maybe I'd have written what I did anyway. What's important to me, however, is that there was a second option.

And I got to start it with a fight from the neighbors. They're so kind; they know just how to wake me up in a way that makes it impossible for me to get back to sleep. Talent, that.

But up I am, and plans I have. I need to make a pan of brownies and something cobbler-esque with some pears so that The Husband and I can head to his mother's tonight. We thought she was going to be out of town for Thanksgiving, but her plans didn't line up, so we're having Thanksgiving with her.

I hope whatever you're doing today it's a good day. We've got sunshine over here, so that's a big win.

This dress and these shoes.

I saw the shoes on an ad on a different site and clicked to get a closer look, and that led me to finding a dress to wear with them. It would be glorious. The little bits of ruffle on the dress add to the princess vibe of the shoe, but there's a nice edge accomplished by the way the dress would fit, and I'd wear as much of my gold jewelry as I could without looking like Mr. T.

It was funny to have that moment where I saw the shoes, squealed, and then immediately looked for something to wear them with. I haven't done that in ages. In high school I was always screwing around with my wardrobe. Busted jeans and a t-shirt one day, full on business attire the next, mini-skirt and knee high boots the day after. I haven't done that in ages. Partly because I spent a huge chunk of time dressing like a respectable adult for a job that was all right but a secondary supervisor who was batshit about "proper dress" while never telling me if what I wore bothered her. Once I was done there, the more casual my clothes, the better. I think it was partly due to working on my college campus. It was like some weird sort of payback that I could get off the shuttle in my busted jeans and t-shirt, and it was just liberating to be able to go to class without worrying that I was representing anyone other than myself.

But now, I think, that feeling is taking a backseat. I think I'm headed back into messing around with my wardrobe and being a fashion magpie. I went to a write-in last night in argyle-patterned tights, the mini-skirt from my Halloween costume, a black top, and self-made arm warmers. Completely and totally weird for me now. Not so strange a few years ago. Man, it's going to be fun to play around like this again.

I am busted-ass tired today. I stayed up entirely too late last night because I was inches away from hitting 50k on the NaNo novel, and I didn't want to turn in until I'd done it. The 50k has been hit, for the record, and were I not so wiped, I'd throw up some victory arms.

Dragged ass out of bed this morning and made it to history class, only to find out that we were simply doing evaluations and being allowed to go. I was aggravated for about two seconds until I realized, a) I wouldn't have to stay coherent enough to take notes, and b) I would end up with a smidge of extra time to finish my media paper. Again, too tired for victory arms.

The paper's nearly complete. I just need to wrap up the project strengths/weaknesses sections, slam out a few sentences about further research and retool my conclusion. If I can keep my attention span properly aligned, I can murder the whole thing in about an hour or two. I could have the whole thing finished before my two o'clock class, and that'd be pretty sweet.

I'm gonna go yawn until my jaw cracks and hunt up some caffeine before too awful long.

Also, my NaNo this year is pretty sweet. Go me.

The demographic info I attempted to gather for my media project is fucked (thanks, lj poll, you fucker). I sent my prof an e-mail asking what to do about it since the lj FAQ was effing useless, and I can't be sure my submission to the help desk will be answered by time the paper is due on Tuesday.

I wrote, and I quote:

But, working in worst case scenario, how does one phrase, "While demographic information is an integral part of feminist standpoint theory, mine went kablooie, and can, therefore, not be used to show anything"?

To which my prof replied, basically, "make it sound as good as possible," and then ended with a gem:

That really sucks.

Would it not be mildly inappropriate, I would buy the man a drink.

I downloaded your plug-in. It went seamlessly. I hit "print." You told me I had coupons waiting. I do not. I closed my browser, re-opened my browser, found my coupons again, and hit "print."

Nothing. No coupons. Now, please, explain to me why you have a Mac-compliant coupon printer, but I have to put the same damned thing on The Husband's PC in order to get my coupons?

BLERGH.

In no particular order:

--Extremely tired. NaNo is eating my soul more quickly than usual because of my classload/homework load. I'm writing very well, and that's very nice, but I would like a nap. Also, I slept through my first class (woke up at 11:30. Shit.) and have had three sodas and am still wiped.

--Had a woman in my bio class tonight say that the world would be better without humans. The world would not be better without humans. Because "better" is a value judgment based on human experience, and without human experience, you can't have an idea of "better" or "worse." I tried to explain this, and she pulled bitchface and told me that I "didn't get it" because I hadn't "done the research." And so I called bullshit again.

--Also had my bio prof called my value judgment argument an issue of semantics. Which it is not.

--And both of these things happened as part of a class discussion over our ethics papers, and I spent five minutes explaining that capitalism and private property are actually good for the environment (because claims about companies not caring about the environment came up) and got a lot of confused looks. Then my prof decided to blame her level of consumerism on capitalism, and I countered with free will.

--If you can't tell by now, Bio is making me nuts.

--Response letters for tomorrow's English class are finished. Huzzah.

--Dear library patrons: LIBRARY VOICES, YOU TWATS. I'm in a study room, with the door closed, and I'm hearing way more than I need to about any of you.

In short, I am tired and hoping I get to bed before midnight.

Had a write-in from 6:00-10:30 tonight, which means I got home at 3:15, ran around the apartment a bit, and was back out the door at 5:15. Guess what I didn't do? Eat dinner. Guess what I can eat at Borders?

Not a goddamned thing.

Guess who's nursing a massive, massive blood sugar headache? Yeah. That'd be me.

I'm trying to pound down the calories, but I'm trying to be healthy about it at the same time. I don't want to shove a bunch of junk in my body; that's just asking for trouble. I've got yogurt, and I think from there I'll go to tortilla chips and salsa. The headache actually drops down to tolerable any time I take a bite of yogurt, but if I let it stand longer than 30 seconds, it comes raging back.

In very good news, I got to day 9 wordcount today (13,000+), my story continues not to suck (shock and awe), and my wrimos have churned out 768,000+ words (rock on!)

And how's the day in your neck of the woods?

For you English-types out there, I'm having trouble figuring out how to cite (MLA) when using purely electronic sources. Checking my Writer's Reference and online has still left me lost. It could be that I'm not searching the right terms. It could be that I'm citing just fine by referencing in-text, or it could be that my brain is just fried.

My money's on the last one. Basically, what I need is this: How do I cite an online article or website with no pagination when I'm referencing the article more than once? I'm sure the answer is right in front of my face, but I can't see it.

My Halloween costume!

( one picture )

The shirt I had. The skirt I crocheted. The boots I had to buy. The Green Lantern symbols on the shirt and boots, plus the trim on the neckline of the shirt, were all painted on in acrylic paint. I made the symbol by tracing a half dollar the edge of a magic card onto a piece of cardboard, cutting it out, and then tracing the shape straight onto the boots and shirt. To get the center, I eyeballed a nickel until it looked centered and traced.

It was a hit. Most people knew who I was this year!

Like being forced to watch 21 minutes of propaganda that flat out lies and makes connections that aren't actually there to let us know that consumerism is bad.

For the record: While we may only have 4% of our "original" forests left in the U.S., we still have plenty of other types of forests. You know why? Because loggers don't want to be out of a job so they replant. Never mind the acres and acres and acres of protected forests.

And, apparently, national happiness has steady decreased since the 1950s. What this has to do with consumerism I don't know, because, a) "happiness" is a broadly defined term that can mean nearly anything to anyone, and b) correlation is not causation.

And you know what? I have no problem with child labor in the third world. You know why? Because the other options are prostitution, drugs, or starving to death. And you know what? America had child labor. It's in all the history books. It is part of the process in becoming a more prosperous country.

Also, I am tired of being told that corporations will always sell me shit and always get me to buy new things like I don't have free will. I buy what I want, when I want, not because an ad makes me feel bad about myself, but because something looks interesting or is useful and I want it. I decide not to buy things more often than I decide to buy them because I have a concept of free will, and I make choices.

Goddamnit; I hate that science classes have been corrupted with this bullshit. It's not science; it's alarmist bullshit and lies.

I did a word count tally for all people on the mass e-mail list for NaNo who had my region set as the home region. Word count? 165,838. U.S. stats aren't showing yet (think they'll pop up at midnight), but right now, my region and my WriMos are beating everyone except New Zealand, Melbourne, and Sydney.

Ladies and gents, my WriMos are conquering Europe. Every goddamned inch of it.

Go, SgfMo!

Daylight Savings' Time (I think that apostrophe is correct) is always a weird experience for me. My body spends about a week convinced I'm an hour off, and I spend a lot of time double-checking every clock I can find. It did give us an extra hour to goof off during the NaNo write-in last night, and that was very, very fun.

My word count is a very healthy 2100. I'm thinking I might use half the write-in for this afternoon for NaNo writing, and then use the other half to work on a couple of papers. I have an edited essay due Tuesday (edits completed, cover letter needed), a Bio essay due on the 9th (sources found, nothing written), my second essay for 500 due on the 11th (little over a page going), and a History book review due on the 17th (book chosen, two paragraphs written). It was terrifying me a few days ago, but looking at it now, it's not so bad. The Bio paper has no set length (she's mentioned she'd like a minimum of 6 double-spaced pages), the History paper needs to be only 5, and the essay is as long as I want it to be. The cover letter for the essay just needs to explain what I've done since my first draft.

The less said about the information gathering for my media project, the better. I'm getting information (yay!); it's the collating that's going to be kind of a bastard.

And now, to make lunch so that I can have plenty of time to pack up for the meeting at 3:00. Go Team Wrimo!

You eat an elephant one bite at a time. The to-do list can be tackled. Really.

The methodology paper I've been sweating was turned in on Tuesday. It was such a huge relief I've spent the rest of the week basically dicking around like an idiot. Well, that, and getting grad school referral packets together, but that's it.

I am currently only half a chapter short of finishing my history reading. I need to throw together a brief references list for a bio paper [tabs are open in my browser, just not in a Word document]. I've got three essays to read for class on Tuesday, but they don't have to be marked [woo-hoo!], but I do need to revise my first workshop piece so I can turn it in on the 3rd and figure out what I'm writing for my second workshop piece to turn it in on the 11th, and then I have to find time to write a third workshop piece before the whole portfolio is due on, I think, the 17th.

There's also a history book review due the 17th, the final push on my research project that requires cataloging replies, a major Dreamweaver project, upcoming essays to which I must formally reply, and then, of course, there's NaNo.

Oh, and my Halloween costume needs to be finished.

I'm stressed but not to the point of needing to scream, so I'll take what I can get and push forward as hard as I can. That's the only option I have at this point.

As I'm sure many of you remember, I completed my internship over the summer. I hadn't heard back from my internship advisor since dropping off my binder, so I dropped her an e-mail to see when I could pick up my portfolio. I just got this:

I am glad you wrote—I needed a reminder to make me finish looking through your magnificent portfolio. You did a great job—a ton of work, and all well done. The “Revisions Letter” to the judge is a masterpiece! Congratulations—I’ll record an A when the time comes.

Have I mentioned my internship advisor is also the head of my degree program? Because, yeah.

I am awesome.

I've taken the first step towards applying for grad school and approached my advisor and two professors about writing me references. They all seem thrilled to be able to recommend me, and I think that's going to help my chances in a big way. I'm only concerned as far as my GPA; it's supposed to be a 3.25 for my full undergrad, and it'll only be a 3.12 or thereabouts when I finish my coursework. I've already been in touch with the English Grad organizer out at Portland State, and he told me that as long as I mention in my statement of purpose that I understand I'd come in as a conditional student, it shouldn't be a huge hurdle.

I am currently ignoring the fact that I need to write a statement of purpose. I know I can do it, and I know what I need it to say, but it's not absolutely necessary to consider at this precise moment, so it's out the door.

What I am thinking about is that if Portland State declines me a place in the program, Portland State not only has a Professional Writing masters, they also have a Book Publishing masters. I nearly considered the Book Publishing masters until I realized I had to jump into the program with a ready manuscript, and I don't have one. But I can take my elective hours in the Professional Writing masters in the Book Publishing program, and that really excites me. I want to edit for a living. I could easily do that with a Professional Writing masters [hell, I could swing it with my bachelor], but what I really, really want is to edit books. And the program for that is at Portland State

I'm putting the cart slightly before the horse, but only in my mind. There are steps to be taken, and I'm getting them started. First up, get the recommendations. I've got verbal confirmations, and I'll be using my two days off school to put together packets for each person who has offered to write me a letter.

But first, my methodology paper.

As the NaNo season is gearing up and my region has a twitter [here], it seemed proper to set one up for myself so that our tweeting NaNoer's can watch me hit a wall as they hit a wall. I'm not being mean; everyone hits a wall during NaNo. If you want to follow along, I'm <a href="http://www.twitter.com/francis_grey>here</a>. francis_grey is my name on the boards at the NaNo site, which is why I chose to use it. That's all I've got for now. My pencil of doom and I have some essays to mark.

I have discovered French Press coffee, people. This may be the greatest invention of all time.

I have also discovered that three cups of French Press gives me the same shakes as 5-6 cups of regularly made coffee. Which makes the $3.25 price tag at the local coffee place for those three cups entirely reasonable.

HOLY CRAP YOU GUYS FRENCH PRESS.